38. Origami Instructions - A book of instructions on how to fold paper into cool things! Unfortunately, it doesn’t actually come with any paper. 28. Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors. 09. Marionette - An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view. Surprisingly fun to mix and match with each other! 08. Malört - A bottle of a foul-tasting liquor produced and distributed exclusively in Chicago, Illinois. It’s literally named after wormwood, if you don’t like strong and bitter alcohol you’ll probably have a bad time. 30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine! - A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it. 02. Hot Sauce - A bottle of very strong hot sauce! Use at your own risk! 49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though. 14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain… 11. Non-Descript Golden Man Award - A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze. 20. Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
BONUS COINS (Courtesy of Vholran): Sotoba: A wooden plank commonly used as a grave marker in Japan. It’s not the sturdiest thing in the world, but it does make for a decent polearm. 70. “Deluxe Letter Opener” - A one-and-a-half handed sword of decent make! For when you want to go Medieval on someone.
CONGRATULATIONS
28. Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors.
09. Marionette - An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view. Surprisingly fun to mix and match with each other!
08. Malört - A bottle of a foul-tasting liquor produced and distributed exclusively in Chicago, Illinois. It’s literally named after wormwood, if you don’t like strong and bitter alcohol you’ll probably have a bad time.
30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine! - A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it.
02. Hot Sauce - A bottle of very strong hot sauce! Use at your own risk!
49. At-Home Planetarium - A glass ball that lights up and projects stars! Doesn’t work if the room is too big or if the lights are on, though.
14. Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you, but it refuses to complain…
11. Non-Descript Golden Man Award - A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze.
20. Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
BONUS COINS (Courtesy of Vholran):
Sotoba: A wooden plank commonly used as a grave marker in Japan. It’s not the sturdiest thing in the world, but it does make for a decent polearm.
70. “Deluxe Letter Opener” - A one-and-a-half handed sword of decent make! For when you want to go Medieval on someone.